Even Fucking Jay McKee Is Fucking Injured

Apologies for the profanity, but I’ve run out of ways to describe Penguins getting injured that don’t involve the word “fucking,” so you’re stuck with that title…

Defenseman Jay McKee has a finger infection that will keep him from playing for two to four weeks, coach Dan Bylsma said after practice today at Mellon Arena. He is the fifth regular on defense to be injured.

On the flip side, it appears there is a good chance defenseman Sergei Gonchar will return tomorrow night when the Penguins play at Ottawa. He has missed the past 12 games because of a broken wrist. If Gonchar can’t play, the team will promote a defenseman from its Wilkes-Barre/Scranton farm club. (P-G)

“Finger infection?” I think that’s just medical mumbo-jumbo for “Upper body injury.”

On the plus side, Gonchar might return against Ottawa, which would force the Pens to come up with some new excuses when their power play keeps sucking. And if he isn’t ready to go by Thursday, the Pens will call up another defenseman from Wilkes-Barre, raising the question: Who in God’s name is playing D for Wilkes-Barre right now? Francois Leroux? Brad Werenka? Craig Patrick’s entire draft classes from 1995-2000? Me?? I think it’s me.

Penguins 6, Bruins 5 (OT): Well, That Was Ridiculous

Not the best game for the Pens’ D, Brent Johnson or (for the first time ever) the power play, but nothing mattered — last night surpassed Jordan Staal vs. Detroit from last year as the most exciting Penguins regular season game since… I don’t know… something memorable Rico Fata probably did.

Not to be overlooked with Guerin’s game-tier or Dupuis’ bizarre winner were an insane deflection by Crosby, goals by Mark Eaton AND Jay McKee (on a Mike Rupp backhander), and…another goal by Pascal Dupuis.

Did this really happen?

Pens Sign Jay McKee To One-Year, $37.99 Deal

The Penguins rounded out their defensive corps by signing bought-out blueliner Jay McKee from the St. Louis blues to a one-year deal reportedly worth less than $1 million.

McKee’s time with the Blues was highly dubious, in no small part because he was on an absurd 4 year, $16 million contract that he somehow kept a straight face and signed before breaking down into laughter in front of the Blues’ front office brass, which resulted in a ruptured funnybone, his first of many injuries in St. Louis.

Still, McKee is exactly what the Pens need — a stay-at home defenseman with a decent physical streak who can eat up Rob Scuderi’s vacated minutes — and the fact that his contract is so reasonable only enhances the shrewdness of the signing. McKee is making a free $2.7 mil from the Blues this year from the buyout, but still, if Scuderi’s worth $3.5 million in this market, McKee could’ve easily gotten a bigger free agent deal from another team; McKee and his agent must be extremely confident that one successful season on the high-profile Pens to set up a deal next offseason will be a smarter long-term strategy than signing for $2 million this season with, say, Atlanta.

What’s even more ridiculous about this deal is that up until probably May of this season, if any team in the NHL were offered the chance to get Jay McKee or Rob Scuderi for the same amount of money, surely everyone would’ve taken McKee. Yes, we can’t just ignore Scuderi’s ’09 playoffs or McKee’s recent injury history, but factoring in the respective financial commitments to the two players — 4 years, $13.6 mil versus 1 year, less-than $1 mil — I’ll happily take on the McKee contact every time.

Now we get to answer a hypothetical question about the universe: can the words “Jay McKee” and “underpaid” actually appear in the same sentence? At least, without being followed by “LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL”?

Rob Scuderi Signs With Kings, And You Will Never Hear His Name Again

I really like Rob Scuderi. His contributions to the Pens’ 2009 Cup Run were absolutely irremovable, if unquantifiable, and he rose to the occassion as the Pens’ most consistent blueliner against elite opposition at a time when the rest of the Penguins’ defensive corps was anything but reliable.

That being said, there was no way the Penguins were going to match the L.A. Kings’ 4 year, $13.6 million offer for Scuderi, nor should they have; Scuderi is a solid but utterly replacable player, and in current NHL salary-cap economics, doling out a $3.4 million annual cap hit for four years on a 30-year-old who before March of this year was viewed as no better than a 4th or 5th defenseman with zero offensive skills is severely inadvisable.

Remember how irreplacable Brooks Orpik seemed after the ’08 Cup run, particularly after all the stupid contract-inflating sportswriter columns about “The Shift?” The Pens ended up signing him to a 6-year deal that certainly doesn’t look painful now but also doesn’t seem entirely necessary; that’s the inflated price you’ll always have to pay for a player entering UFA status off the best two months of hockey they’ve ever played. Rob Scuderi is an ok NHL defenseman, but even excepting the Pens’ cap situation, he’s simply not worth that much money.

The St. Louis Blues made a mistake when they envisioned Jay McKee — a 28-year-old defensive defenseman coming off his most prominent season in 2006 — as the instant answer to all their defensive woes, signing him to a 4-year, $16 million contract that ended up being a disaster and which was recently cut short with a buyout. I surely wish Scuderi more success in L.A. than McKee had with the Blues, but the situations aren’t entirely dissimilar; Scuderi is two years older than McKee was at the time, both had showed little indication of offensive ability, and Scuderi’s reputation was largely bolstered by his team’s strong season in his UFA year (McKee’s Sabres won 52 games and fell a game short of the Cup Finals in ’06.)

Different situation, different results? Maybe. But I’ll happily allow another team to pay Scuderi’s contract while we find out.