Boucher Retires; Penguins Enter Rebuilding Phase

ESPN:

Penguins veteran defenseman Philippe Boucher announced his retirement Thursday, going out in style as a Stanley Cup champion.

“For the past 17 years I have been living my dream of playing hockey in the National Hockey League,” Boucher, 36, said in a statement. “After finishing this season with the Stanley Cup Champion Pittsburgh Penguins, I realized that is time for me to walk away from the game I love. I have always admired athletes that have retired as champions and I am humbled to have the chance to count myself among them.”

Ahhhh, crap. We knew the core wasn’t gonna stay together forever, but it’s definitely time to trade Crosby and Malkin for draft picks, cut some cap room, and start thinking about building long-term around Jay McKee.

GAME ONE: Pens 3, Hurricanes 2 — Fleury And Cam Ward Pay Homage To “Trading Places”

Game One of the Eastern Finals wasn’t entirely unlike the majority of the Washington series: The Pens dominated the first and mostly controlled the third, sandwiched around a dangerously lackadaisical second and topped off with an apparent willingness to give away their two-goal lead as easily as possible. The Pens only allowed 25 shots, right around the total they gave up in many of the Capitals games, yet the Canes had about 23 heart-attackey scoring chances, for an out-of-whack “Scored/Almost Scored per Shot” ratio also right in line with the Capitals series.

The difference? Marc-Andre Fleury made all the saves he had to plus a number of spectacular ones, and Cam Ward allowed two semi-questionable goals certainly not befitting his reputation as a playoff game-stealer. Just as we predicted.  .  .  [Cough] .  .  . what?

The Game One win was exactly that, though: a Game One win. The Hurricanes played a couple sloppy periods, only had two power plays, and didn’t get their best game from Cam Ward, and they still almost tied this one up on the road in the third period. To think this series is anything but just beginning — even independently of the Canes’ comebacks in Rounds 1 and 2 of the playoffs — would be foolish. Not to be Captain Pessimist McRepetitive, but when I remarked to my brother “Fleury straight-up outplayed Ward, how bout that?” he instantly, soberly replied, “Yep. And do you really expect that to happen throughout the entire series?” In case you were wondering, that loud bursting noise you just heard was my precious, precious bubble.

Random thoughts:

– I’m really glad we finally have a proven playoff performer who can go to the net and bury his chances like Miroslav Satan, cause Chris Kunitz just wasn’t getting it done. (This sentence would have been a wacky joke one month ago, and now it’s a funny/sad truth)

– Clearing the zone continues to be an adventure for the Pens’ defensemen and backchecking forwards, even when they’re six inches from their own blueline with the puck and no one pressuring them. They’re like an ongoing experiment in finding creative ways to not get the puck out of their zone against all odds and physics.

– Not Eric Staal’s loudest playoff game; I wouldn’t expect this to keep up for the majority of the series, especially if the Canes start earning more power plays. Did you know he is brothers with Jordan Staal of the Penguins?? In fact there is other Staal brothers wowww!

– The Scott Walker interference penalty and Satan holding penalty in the first were both BS; the refs appeared to get their antsyness out of the way early, then decided not to call anything the rest of the game (including Matt Cooke’s interference/leg thing on Jussi Jokinen and Eric Staal shooting Fleury’s stick away from him right before the Canes’ second goal).

– I don’t want to see the Pens try to grind out the remainder of the playoffs with only eleven forwards, but can they really afford to bench Philippe Boucher for Pascal Dupuis after Boucher’s game-winning goal and really nice assist in Game One? I imagine he’s bought a starting spot for at least another game; you never know, too, as injuries are always possible at any time. I also miss Dupuis’ super-predictable slapshot from 50 feet away coming down the left wing that goes in once every fifty games.

– How much better did both Hurricanes power plays look than any of the Pens’ power plays? The Pens’ first two advantages were particularly embarrassing. I said in my prediction post that I don’t trust the Pens’ superior PP% numbers to the Canes’ for one second, and was justified by their man advantage misadventures once again this game.

– A friend of mine reminded me the oft-forgotten detail that Tyler Kennedy is still only 22. He’s been playing with unbelievable patience and confidence this entire postseason, and came close to two well-earned goals in Game One.

– Another friend of mine pointed out that Mellon Arena sounded strangely quiet for the majority of the game, which I couldn’t help but notice also, especially in the third (and was dead silent after the Corvo goal). If the Arena was actually loud and Versus merely did a poor job of capturing the sound, then I stand corrected, but it would also be the first time the Versus NHL coverage ever did anything that wasn’t completely perfect.

– Finally, for all the Pens fans who complain about how the team doesn’t shoot the puck enough and tries to make a nice play too often, which is often true, the Hurricanes last night passed up more no-brainer shooting chances than I recall the Pens ever passing up in a single game this year. Ray Whitney is essentially reverse-Ovechkin with his shooting decisions, and if the Pens had attempted that double-pass from point blank range that the Canes ended up shooting into Kris Letang’s ass, the cries of “JUST SHOOT IT!” from the Mellon Arena crowd would have struck a chord so loud as to shatter the scoreboard and short-out the lights in the building, Sudden Death style, resulting in a home team forfeit. Just remember that next time Crosby tries to set up Chris Kunitz and he whiffs on a one-timer instead of firing it three feet wide.

GAME FIVE: Pens 4, Capitals 3 (OT) — Geno Scores Brilliant, Intentional Overtime Winner

Not sure how many times I can repeat the same things, but here goes:

– The Pens have outplayed the Caps for the majority of the series, and deserve their 3-2 lead.

– That being said, the Pens still make it too easy for the Capitals to score, too often. The Caps’ entire offense has been based on random, isolated rushes up the ice; they haven’t managed more than a shift or two of sustained forechecking pressure ( / dumbass Penguins keeping it in their own zone when one foot from the blue line) at a time in the past couple games, and if the Pens can just grab an additional unexpected Fleury save or lucky offensive bounce, there’s no reason to believe they shouldn’t close this thing out Monday night. Remember how well they played at home against Philly when they had a chance to finish them off?? Wait, um…I mean……… rabbits are fuzzy. Teeheeheeee rabbits.

– I did quickly rush to rip on Tom Poti for his game-winning effort, but my brother correctly pointed out, if he hadn’t made a play on the puck it would’ve gone to a wide-open Crosby for a tap-in. The real blame on the goal goes to Bruce Boudreau for inexplicably leaving Sergei Federov in at defense while shorthanded to take on Crosby and Malkin. Watch the clip again – Malkin goes right around Federov untouched. I understand throwing him on D late in the game when you’re trailing, but in overtime? Mind-boggling.

– Marc-Andre Fleury was drafted with the first overall pick six years ago. We shouldn’t still be worrying on a game-by-game basis whether or not he’ll just randomly let a long-distance, untipped wrist shot in, essentially spotting the other team a goal every night. I almost get angry at him now when he follows his spastic mishaps with awesome redemption saves; I don’t like to be confused while complaining.

– In Fleury’s defense (or lack of defense…heyo!!!), Brooks Orpik was playing some serious Washington Generals caliber D on that first Ovechkin goal. Could he possibly be that afraid of challenging Ovechkin one-on-one? He doesn’t have to line up Ovechkin and run him, he just has to get a stick on him or some body position or anything other than letting him set up for his nine hundredth predictable-ass high glove side wrister of the series.

– I’m not quite pushing the panic button about Sergei Gonchar’s injury. Maybe it’s the homer/optimist in me, but we’ve gotta remember, he was probably the Pens’ weakest defensive defenseman in the playoffs to this point, and calling him the “quarterback of the power play” is like calling someone the “anchor of the Detroit Lions’ defense.” Do you really think the Pens will be that much worse on the man advantage with Alex Goligoski at the point instead of Gonchar, the way they’ve been going? Are they going to score negative times? Is Goligoski gonna turn around and throw a puck past Fleury when he’s not looking, then slash Crosby’s Achilles? I realize it’s a lot of ice time to redistribute, and Phillippe Boucher makes me nervous as hell, but I don’t think Gonchar-to-Goligoski is quite the chasm-like dropoff that some fans appear to fear, especially with the way Gonchar had been playing.

– Alexander Semin has to be injured; every time he gets the puck, he’s peeling back and looking to pass immediately, and every time he’s shot the puck, his release has been uncharacteristically slow and everything’s been blocked or wide.

– Viktor Kozlov sucks. He doesn’t hustle, doesn’t play physically, and is good for usually one or two five-second bursts of tallness-using puck possession per game, and if he doesn’t score during that span, he’s invisible.

– Caps fans apparently wanted an interference call on Phillippe Boucher in overtime just prior to the Malkin tripup. I will respond to all complaints about officiating in this series by linking this clip.

– On the FSN Pittsburgh coverage, just prior to overtime, the announcers agreed “you get the feeling that Chris Kunitz has been saving his best for that big moment…” Which is a kind way of saying “Chris Kunitz does not know what a net is anymore.”

– Think Jordan Staal and Ruslan Fedotenko recently watched the video of their 7-6 overtime win against the Red Wings from earlier this season and were like “oh wow, we’re talented, professional hockey players! Let’s do that some more!” When was the last time a Penguin just buried a puck into the upper corner the way Fedotenko did on that second goal? Maybe Malkin in like, February?

– And last, but definitely not least: Two legitimate assists for Miro Satan now in consecutive games?? Why didn’t Ray Shero sign this guy to a five-year deal when he had the chance??

Letang Says He’s OK To Play, Stay Out For 2 Minutes On Every Useless Power Play

Kris Letang was apparently injured at the end of Game 2 but says he’s ready to play tonight, hopefully alleviating the Pens’ need to dress Philippe Boucher, have Boucher get a shot on goal real early in a power play and make you think “finally, someone’s shooting it!”, then screw up in his own zone seventeen times in the remainder of the period and remind you why he’s not dressing:

Letang said the left-shoulder injury he received when hit by Capitals’ defenseman Mike Green late in the Penguins’ 4-3 loss in Game 2 Monday was diagnosed as a strain.

A decision on whether Letang dresses tonight will be made by coach Dan Bylsma, Letang said.

No word on whether or not Sergei Gonchar and Brooks Orpik are also ready to resume playing the sport of hockey.

GAME 5: Flyers 3, Pens 0 — Or Maybe We’ve Been Outplayed Four Straight Games?

You’re out drinking with friends on a Wednesday night, and it’s around 12, you’ve had a couple beers, but you’re getting ready to go home so you can wake up for work, then you get a text from another friend who’s clearly drunker than you are but implores you to come to some other awesome bar to meet up with a high school friend of yours you haven’t seen in years, and you end up saying “ah, screw it” and taking a cab there, drinking til 4, getting way drunker than you intended, then rolling into work at noon the next day unshowered and really obviously hungover (and still semi-drunk), only to learn that your boss had to leave for the west coast the night before and isn’t in the office, and nobody’s doing real work, so nobody cares. You traipse through the day without a problem and talk to your friend online about how your alarm was going off for an hour before you even noticed it, and how you woke up with a 90% uneaten box of White Castle chicken rings, and you both laugh for a long time but agree that it was probably a dumb idea and you shouldn’t do it again.

One week later, the exact same thing happens, and the next morning your boss happens to be out sick, and you still laugh about it with your friend and you’re not in any trouble, but it’s not as funny as the first time, and your headache is significantly worse than the first time and it doesn’t go away. Then you do it again two nights later, then again the following week, then finally one Thursday morning at 11:30, your cell phone has seven missed calls from your boss and it finally hits you — “Oh crap, I’ve been living like an alcoholic. I really can’t keep doing this.”

So here’s the Penguins, still up 3-2 after playing four straight subpar hockey games, but instead of looking at a 3-1 series and laughing about how lucky they’ve gotten with their two late power play goals in Game 2 and Fleury’s 45-save Game 4, they’re instead heading back to the road forced to stare at their complete lack of a power play and total inability to finish. Besides the first period in Game 5 (which ended 0-0), the Penguins have not outplayed the Flyers convincingly in a single period since Game 1, and with a chance to even the series for the Flyers in the balance, all notions of “the Pens just found a way to gut it out” are giving way to “oh wait, the Pens are playing crappy hockey and if they continue to play crappy hockey they will be beaten at the game of hockey.” A sobering loss makes things that much simpler.

Crosby had his worst game of the series, following up an inspired Game 4 by being an essential nonfactor on offense and directly causing the Flyers’ backbreaking third goal with a lame, predictable backhand pass to the point where three Flyers were stationed. Malkin fared better, at least managing to kick a goal in, but still ended up stuck in far too many 2-minute shifts that ended with him being tired and unable to battle for pucks. Satan’s upgrade over bizarro-Sykora was minimal, though he did blow two moderate scoring chances, Phillippe Boucher failed to clear an easy puck on the second Flyers’ goal and his shoot-first power play approach wasn’t nearly as effective as the “shoot it!” yelling home crowd would’ve loved for it to have been, and even the lengthiest puck-possession cycling shifts by the Staal line rarely led to a legitimate scoring opportunity in the last two periods.

I recall a friend of mine suggesting at the beginning of the playoffs that the Pens wouldn’t be able to maintain Dan Bylsma’s much-lauded aggressive style of play through the entire postseason, which I dismissed as ridiculous, because these are impeccably-conditioned professional athletes and the Pens’ newfound depth after the deadline would set them up ideally for a long Cup run. Instead, the Pens really have looked tired the past couple games, they haven’t maintained their aggression at all, they’re barely forechecking on the powerplay, they’re not making the Flyers’ defensemen work, they’re sure as hell not making Biron work (aside from the past first period, which Biron handled admirably), they’re not connecting on extremely simple neutral zone passes, and aside from the third line at times, none of the talent and chemistry that defined the past month of Penguins hockey has been prevalent in these past couple games. Yes, it’s the playoffs, so there’s theoretically going to be less room to make plays and uglier goals and a greater emphasis on special teams, but the Flyers ought to be just as tired as the Penguins and they’re simply not showing it anywhere close to as obviously, and the Pens are now undeniably fortunate to be on the brighter side of their 3-2 series.

So what to do in Game 6? I would say “more urgency on the power play” and “bury your chances,” but I’ve been saying that for three games and it hasn’t happened. Instead, let’s start with “stop being complete retards in the offensive zone,” same thing in the defensive zone, and from there, we’ll work up to the complicated stuff (e.g. completing passes, breakouts, ever getting traffic in front of the net, ever getting rebounds, hitting the net, not having every single shot blocked by three dudes, and so on.)