GAME TWO: Pens 7, Hurricanes 4 — The Teams Put On A Defensive Clinic

— Not a bad evening for the individual at the top of this blog:

Chris Kunitz had a goal and two solid assists, clearly inspired by my post on Wednesday making fun of him. Fleury had a solid Game 1 after I made fun of him, Viktor Kozlov and Tom Poti both had great Game 6s after I ripped on them, and Rob Scuderi and David Steckel ended up having important roles in the Washington series after I joked about the amount of attention they wouldn’t get. Without hyperbole, I can honestly say that this blog is probably the most important factor in the NHL Playoffs at the moment, and possibly in all of sports.

Cam Ward is gonna be pissed when he shows up to this series and finds out that some dude’s been wearing his jersey and ruining his numbers.

— I’d rip on Kris Letang for his wussy pass to set up Dennis Seidenberg for the third Carolina goal, but it was just trampled in the blitzkrieg of horrible defense for about 59:99 of this game (the other second was Rob Scuderi clearing a puck once). Would either of these teams be able to face the Red Wings right now without a goal light shorting out?

Tim Gleason was on the wrong end of about 14 Penguin goals tonight, give or take.

Eric Staal’s playing in this series too, right?

Brooks Laich (I think) made fun of the Mellon Arena stat-keepers during a between-periods interview last series, saying they intentionally rack up more shots for the Penguins, and at the time I ripped on him because if Sidney Crosby would ever say something like that in an interview every blog would be copy-pasting their “Crosby is a whiner” rants, but that being said, there is NO WAY the Penguins outshot the Hurricanes 16-6 in the second period of last night’s game.

— The Pens’ power play mimicked competency as the game progressed, and you know what that means: Horrible, anger-inducing power play right off the bat in Game Three to immediately puncture your new confidence.

— And finally, you know things are going right when Miroslav Satan stands up for his teammates during a last-minute scuffle by attempting to stickhandle Patrick Eaves.

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