My Dream Game Seven Outcome

Beggars can’t be choosers, as choosers like to say, so I’ll take a Pens victory in Game Seven any way I can. But if I had to pick a Game Seven “dream outcome,” I definitely have one in mind…

A lot of Pens fans would probably love to see Crosby bank the winning goal off Marian Hossa’s eye and in the net, or possibly Malkin to score the winner on a breakaway after Hossa suffers a heart attack and turns the puck over, or maybe Fleury launching a puck the length of the ice and it hitting off the boards, rocketing back into the crease, hitting Osgood’s ass and slowwwly trickling over the line in the final second of regulation (then Hossa explodes).

No, my fantasy outcome isn’t quite that spiteful. In my ideal Game Seven, a 0-0 game enters the fifth Overtime period, with the shots close to even at about 130 per team, and the game-winning goal is finally scored by PASCAL DUPUIS doing the “Dupuis” and firing a slap shot from a crappy angle down the left wing that miraculously beats Osgood. Dupuis is given the Conn Smythe, and boasts on the air, “I TOLD you that works about once every 40 games!”

The Lightning then offer Dupuis a 7 year, $45 million deal on the ice as he is carrying the Cup around, but he turns it down.


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