Montreal Canadiens Apparently Last People On Earth Who Still Think Scott Gomez Is Good

Rangers GM Glen Sather is whitewashing a fence.

Glen Sather: Dag nabbit. How’m I gon get ridduh this here Scott Gomez? I’d sure like me tah get some better hockey players but I ain’t never gonna fittem under my dag blastid salary cap!

Canadiens GM Bob Gainey walks by, whistling.

Bob Gainey: Ha ha, crazy ol’ Glen, you a bigger sucker than a leech on a camel! Did Aunt Polly stick you with Scott Gomez’s contract?

Glen Sather: No siree! I love me some Scott Gomez’s contract! Hoo-eee, 5 more years and $33 million left for a completely average forward who’s scored 13, 16, and 16 goals the past three seasons while earning upwards of $8 million, which is around what Crosby, Malkin, Ovechkin, Thornton, Zetterberg, Kovalchuk, and Iginla make! Goll-eee, it’s funner’n a family uh weasels in a barrel full o’ sarsparilla!

Bob Gainey: Wait…you sayin’ you LIKE havin’ Scott Gomez’s contract?

Glen Sather: Sher’ do! Havin’ Scott Gomez’s contract isssssuuhhhhhhh tttheeeebestttts!!!

Bob Gainey: Well gee whiz, Glenny…I’d sure like to try havin’ me some Scott Gomez’s contract, if it ain’t too much bother.

Glen Sather: Ain’t no way in kermuffins I’m-uh lettin’ you have mah Scotty Gomez contract. You’s best keep right on-a walkin’.

Bob Gainey: Awwwww come on, Glensy, I thoughts we was friends! Just lemmie try for a might two minutes!

Glen Sather: Maybe we cun’ work some’in out. What’s it to ya?

Bob Gainey: How bout productive winger Chris Higgins, who’s 4 years younger than Gomez and makes $6 million less, and an exchange of minor leaguers? Gosh I wanna try havin’ me some Scott Gomez contract really bad, Glenny, uh really doo!!!

Glen Sather: Wellllllll…. ok. You can have Scott Gomez’s contract. But just this once!!

Bob Gainey: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!

Six Months Pass.

Bob Gainey: Goll-eee, Glenny, those Montreal types sure did fire me good!


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3 Responses to “Montreal Canadiens Apparently Last People On Earth Who Still Think Scott Gomez Is Good”

  1. habs4ever Says:

    Nice blog! 🙂 BTW how did you do your header?

  2. Danimal Says:

    Gomez is good, and will put up some points in Montreal, but the Habs better hope what they gave up doesn’t amount to much because Gomez’s contract won’t justify what he does give them

  3. pożyczki pod zastaw auta łódź Says:

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