Kunitz To Miss Two Weeks With “Playing For ’09 Penguins”

Yayyy, Malkin’s coming back! Aaaaaand Chris Kunitz is hurt:

The Penguins’ Chris Kunitz will be out about two weeks — beginning tonight against Boston at Mellon Arena — for what coach Dan Bylsma called a lower-body injury that has been plaguing the left winger for some time….

Malkin is expected to shift to winger and play on a line with Sidney Crosby and Ruslan Fedotenko, at least early in the game.

Bylsma also said forward Mark Letestu would make his NHL debut against Boston.

I picture a cartoony scene where Malkin enters the revolving door to the Pens’ dressing room and the door keeps spinning, Kuntiz’s tie gets caught, and it flings him back out of the locker room, keeping the injury numbers the same.

It’s actually kind of funny at this point. Kunitz was playing terribly, and I don’t doubt for a second that he could’ve had a nagging injury, but I gave up being frustrated three injuries ago and now I’m just laughing.

While we’re going for broke, how bout we just give Crosby a spinal issue? And Fleury gets shot in the ass, Joey Porter style. And Mark Letestu just explodes the second his skate touches the ice.

I would knock on wood after making these jokes, but I’m afraid a splinter might break off and fly through Goligoski’s brain.

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